I try to be myself, as they always said
But I am shackled to this giveway chest and high-pitched breath
I am imprisoned by my body
Restricted to picking one- boy or girl
When I really am both
And the one I would pick is the one the world decides I am not
Hello, miss, can I help you
Miss, you dropped this
Miss, this is the men’s clothes
Miss, miss, miss, they all missed who I am
The onslaught of girl, girl, girl
Imprisons the man inside me
And the man inside me
Squashes the girl that still tries to show her face
That still wants to wear makeup and jewelry
And be called her own name
And the one time they almost got it right
Is the one time she’s in full bloom
My name is Elena
Oh, sorry, miss.
My name is Cameron.
Are you a boy or a-
A lot of us are less than well-informed about how to have safe sex and prevent pregnancy as trans* guys, partially because there isn’t a lot of information out there specifically for us.
-For oral sex involving vulvas (vulvae?), a good way to reduce the chance of STI transmission is to use dental dams. These can be purchased at sex shops and similar locations or created using saran wrap, condoms, latex gloves, or other materials. They are also sometimes available for free or very cheap at university health centers, Planned Parenthoods, and LGBTQ resource centers.
-If you’re using a prosthetic/dildo for vaginal, oral, or anal sex, it is important to make sure the materials it is made of are safe and that it is kept clean. Certain materials are more likely to grow bacteria than others, and certain materials contain phthalates, which are chemicals used to soften PVC and may be dangerous (a good rule of thumb to tell if a prosthetic contains phthalates is if it has a greasy texture and/or smells strongly of plastic). Prosthetics that are labeled non-porous and phthalate-free are generally safer, but that doesn’t let you off the hook for regular cleaning. Different materials require different cleaning methods, and so it’s good to do your research. If you are unsure if your prosthetic is clean and free of harmful chemicals, using a condom can help make things a bit safer for your partner. As a side note, if you suspect that your packer may contain harmful chemicals, you may want to wear it so it is not directly against your skin (for instance over your underwear or in its own little sock).
-Testosterone may stop you from ovulating, but it probably isn’t a good idea to use it as your only form of birth control. Hormonal birth control while on testosterone is not really an option, so the pill, patch, and shot are out. However, condoms, diaphragms, and non-hormonal IUDs are still effective options for guys on T (this is not a complete list of all methods, and not all methods are created equal, look up effectiveness and weigh the pros and cons of each method). Hormonal birth control is fine for guys who are not on testosterone, although many trans* guys are uncomfortable with some of the “feminizing” effects hormonal birth control may have (for example, breast enlargement or breast tenderness).
For more information on safer sex and contraception, check out Planned Parenthood’s website (unfortunately pretty much geared toward cis people but still pretty helpful), MegaThatcher’s video on Safe Sex for Trans Guys, and Queertransmen.org.
1- Saran wrap is not OK for dental dams. It’s still too porous a material, so use latex barriers, or vinyl, if you’re allergic to latex.
2- You should always use a condom on sex toys. Unless you’re only using them on yourself, it keeps them cleaner and safer for sharing. Reading the care instructions that come with sex toys will help you better care for them, and it will also inform you about the product’s materials. In keeping with that, also be sure that your lube is compatible with the materials as well.
3- Testosterone does not stop ovulation in everyone, even if it stops menstruation. Hormonal birth control is not an option PERIOD, because overloading your body with hormones can cause serious health problems. Testosterone can be converted into a chemical similar to estrogen, which can increase the risk of things like cancer, severe headaches, muscle problems, and so on. It’s similar to the problems encountered by women during the early development and usage of hormonal birth control.
Furthermore, the only birth control method that also protects against STIs is a condom (or the female condom). Diaphragms and IUDs are great for preventing the remote chance of pregnancy, but they do not prevent the exchange of bodily fluids. Keep that in mind when making decisions about safer sex.
it’s microwavable saran wrap that is too porous. Non-microwavble, though not ideal, does still work.
*en español abajo In developing your sexuality, what kinds of messages do you find everyday, at home, in the media, at school, or on TV? What contradicts and what affirms you? Make a video, write a poem, song, or an essay — or even create an original work of art — and express your thoughts. If we feature your contribution on the site, we will send you a free VenusPlusX t-shirt to thank you.
Video by Tiye Massey.
*Traducción al español por Artemis Lopez
Proyecto de liberación sexual: Donde culminan las cosas
A medida que se desarrolla tu sexualidad, ¿qué tipo de mensajes te encuentras de día a día, en casa, en los medios de comunicación, en el colegio, o en la televisión? ¿Qué te contradice y qué te apoya?Creo que, verdaderamente, nos desarrollamos según los aspectos de nuestra cultura, de cómo nos crían, de las reglas sociales. Y creo que los medios de comunicación también afectan profundamente cómo definimos nuestra sexualidad. Creo que es una culminación de cosas. Y, como dijo él, si aprendemos algo en casa pero luego vamos al colegio y pasamos ocho horas con otros estudiantes y con nuestros amigos, aprendemos cosas totalmente diferentes. Y luego vamos a casa a hacer los deberes, pero luego vemos la tele toda la noche, y, ¡aprendemos cosas totalmente diferentes de las que aprendimos todo el día! Así que creo que son muchas cosas a la vez, y que todas están conectadas y que nuestra sexualidad se desarrolla conjuntamente con todas esas cosas.
Graba un video, escribe un poema, una canción, o un ensayo – o incluso crea una obra de arte – y expresa lo que piensas sobre estos temas. Si publicamos tu contribución, te mandaremos una camiseta de VenusPlusX de regalo.
Video de Tiye Massey.
WOW…peep the inappropriate “H” word used…is this person intersexed? transgender or in general gender-noncomforming? what are their preferred pronouns? were they even asked? was this even an option in 1938? (yes these are somewhat rhetorical questions). as i viewed the comments associated with this photo, i was immediately annoyed with a few, but realized how many more expressed sympathy at how difficult life must have been for this person “back then.” transgender people in general continue to face significant violence right now. and, uh, lets not forget that racism is not over.
here are a few (but not all) of the alarming statistics from the National Center for Transgender Equality’s recent survey on discrimination faced by black transgender persons:
- black transgender people live in extreme poverty with 34% reporting a household income of less than $10,000 per year
- black transgender people report an extremely high unemployment rate (26%), two times the rate of the overall transgender population and four times the rate of the general population.
- 46% report being harassed at work, 41% have experienced homelessness, 49% have attempted suicide.
and that isn’t all, PLEASE read the full survey HERE: click on the first link titled “Injustice at Every Turn…”
the experience of being black in this racist country is enough to produce insanity, but combine that with other experiences, such as being impoverished, female, transgender, etc and it can be unbearable. the fight for justice isn’t over.
want to get involved? contact the National Black Justice Coalition, an organization fight for the rights of black LGBT folks. (legally of course i must say i am not a representative of their organization, neither did NBJC approve this msg. :-D )